On a mid winters eve
In a small country town
My thoughts drift and float
As my eyes fluttered down
And I listen while I sit
To the soft gentle sound
Of my fathers rich voice
While he’s reading out loud
From the Bible thats sheltered
And compassed around
The life of my family
In this small country town
Devotions
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Beautiful. I really like “the life of my family in this small country town.”
nice
Very nicely done… noticed it’s not in free verse either. ;-)
Not to be nitpicky, but punctuation?
Harrison: Hmm… I hadn’t really thought about it. I’m not sure it needs punctuation, as the line breaks break on the phrase (its a habit I find hard to break and which limits my poetry a lot), and the poem is small enough to be read as one complete thought.
How would you punctuate it?
JWall,
First, stranger, Happy New Year.
Second. T’would make a good lyric. Perhaps I’ll work on that. It does flow very nicely.
Oh, and Happy one year anniversary Flat Man.
Sean: Thanks! Same to you. Yours was back in Dec right?
I would love to hear you put it to music. I have this dream of writing a poem and having someone like Loreena McKennitt set it to music. I think you’d do a good job.
I was referring to the lack of punctuation such as this:
On a mid-winter’s eve
You panted a beautiful picture. I love it when I can see what is written in my minds eye.
Every family needs a shepherd for his flock so not one will stray. It’s the missing puzzle piece in most families today. It has priceless rewards here and in heaven.
I hope you feel blessed to have such a family!!
I love it!
the way it lilts gives the secure, steady feeling conveyed in the words themselves
about punctuation: I like the lack of it except in the word “thats” because of the confusing ambiguity it causes in such an important phrase; everywhere else it conveys a flowing unclutteredness, the uncluttered feeling you get when you’re home and comfortable with the people around you
it feels like home =)